Well I didn’t get rid of the cat, seems like they love the stupid creature so it isn’t going anywhere. I’ve tried working on her so that she’ll just leave but that isn’t working either. No matter how much I chase her around and get on her nerves she sticks around like the rodent she is. I’ve discovered that I kind of like the danger anyway, winding her up until she hisses at me is a bit scary but it’s a pretty intense buzz. The adrenaline kicks in and I run (faster than her) but I can always come back for more later.

I chase dogs too sometimes. When mum takes me to the field and unhooks me from the lead I get to run free. There are normally loads of other dogs around and I get to make some friends while the cat’s locked in at home. She can’t steal attention while I’m at the field. They take me to training too, it’s a bit like school and can be a bit of a drag sometimes. But – oh boy! The treat quota while I’m there is heavy. All I have to do is touch a hand with my nose, or maybe sit down and clickclick there’s a treat for me. Easy.

I got a new bone this week, bright yellow and deeeee-licious. I pretend it’s cat flavoured and rip it to shreds. She should be scared and run away but I don’t think she realises. It doesn’t really matter though, she spends most of her time curled up on a dining-room chair sleeping. I’ve never seen anyone sleep so much in my life, there are so many things to do besides sleep! You can run, that’s my favourite. You can play tug of war or fetch. You can find one of the people and they’ll give you a good belly rub…

I love belly rubs. I try to keep my eyes open but it’s so heavenly it’s a tough job. They’ve used them to coerce me before though… into the bath! The worst experience. Come on Noche, there’s a good girl, ooh a nice doggy massage. NO. A nice doggy massage is a belly rub, it is definitely not having gooey sticky shampoo rubbed into my fur. Then they turn the water on and it hisses like the cat and rains on me! It’s warmer than rain which is better, but still not good. When I get out I always give myself a big shake all over them, serves them right for shoving me in the shower and getting me all wet.

But mostly it isn’t too bad here. I have my toys, my bed and my sofa. I have my people, and I don’t have to share them too much because I don’t actually think the cat’s that keen on their attention. I guess I’ll just have to get used to her… and those damn baths!


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